I subscribe to an email from Urban Dictionary and found a word I'd like to hear Lino use, because I never heard of people calling in sick through email or texting until The Catholic Guy Crew came along:

Flee-Mail

E-Mail typically used at work to get out of work or justify absences.

I'm able to text my own boss, with pictures even, but would NEVER get away with calling in sick like this! I know Jared and Lou used this for recent absences.